Stresslaxing

The definition of stresslaxing: Being stressed that relaxing makes you more stressed because you’re not working on what’s making you stressed. I found this on my Instagram feed the other day and this hit hard. This has been me for awhile now. So, I posted it on fakebook, and people resonated with it. Glad I am not alone 😉 Ok, so why do we feel like this?

Societal influences is a major factor. Society pressures us into thinking if we are not doing, we are being lazy. Also, it’s a money thing. We don’t make enough……ever…….so we make ourselves feel bad for taking time for ourself because there are opportunities awaiting us. We know the opportunities, but it takes a lot of work, then we get overwhelmed…THEN we take a minute to recharge, and we feel bad for it. Due to the fact we didn’t accomplish what we were thinking or what we wanted to get accomplished.

Goal oriented. It’s the new year and most of us have goals. The new year is a fresh start, right? Why does it take a new year? What if there wasn’t a new year holiday? What if a day had no number? A day is simply a day. Why didn’t you start that new goal mid December? I’m sure you wanted to, but then you stresslaxed. Had to wait for that new year…didn’t you? How long are you going to work on your goal that started on the 1st? It was amazing the amount of fakebook posts on, “I’m going to be a better person, ” I am going to exercise more, ” “I am going to have a more positive attitude.” Why are you telling everyone you are going to do this? Why do you have to post this? You should have already started this yesterday. You should be a better person. You should exercise, because it will make you feel better. You should be more positive. Stop posting it and just do it.

Yes, I am going to rant about fakebook, instagram, snappy snap. I told myself I would try and understand why people post every joyful moment. I am still not understanding. Are you not enjoying the moment while it is happening, or do you need others to react to it to feel the joy? Why are you not living in the moment, taking it all in? Yes, I do post on fakebook. I have cut way back because I really don’t give a shit what people think unless it helps them like this post about stresslaxing. If people can resonate with a feeling of anxiety, confidence, thinking they are not doing enough, or depression; I have done my job. All of your joyous moments on social media, people are not resonating. They are thinking…..why can’t I have that much fun with my family? The failure component comes up for social media consumers. Yes, it is not your fault for other people’s feelings, but there is something that is empty in your soul that is not being fulfilled by yourself or your companions. If you disagree, that’s fine.

I have had numerous coaching sessions where social media was the common denominator for why they felt disconnected, why they feel like they are failing, they are not good enough. It’s a pandemic. How do we stop it? You tell me and if you do feel inclined to tell me, start practicing your own preaching. If you need social media to make yourself feel better, you need some deep work. Hey, guess what? It’s the new year, might be a great place to start working on yourself. The people that come in your life are your teachers, are you listening? You sure are reading:)

P.S. To the stresslackers out there……give yourself some grace. It’s the only way forward.