Mixology

May Day! You can take that a few different ways. I take it as the day before my arrival to this wonderful yet difficult at times world we live in. Yes, it is my 40th birthday tomorrow. Woowee, I didn’t think I would be in the position that I am in today. Meaning..never married, no kids(now in a relationship including two kids), dropped down to part time at a corporate system, starting my own coaching business, learning new ways of medicine, and knowing which way I want to proceed. Now, a few years ago, I was on the political train and voiced my opinions very loudly and negatively. Where did it get me? Pretty much no where. So as I am sitting here embarking on a new journey, I just wonder where it is going to take me. I have a new mindset so the political influences are there, I just don’t spend hours on them.

Also, I am now in a relationship where we grow together without the outside world influencing us. We work through the hard times and we communicate, sometimes not effectively, but we get there. We have had ups and downs, just like any other relationship, however, we are both being guided with outside resources to learn as to why we became the way we are. We both have two definite communication styles. One of us is very talkative, one of us is not. Can you guess which one I am?

Empath vs Empath. When you have two empaths in a relationship, you care so much about each other’s feelings, you are frustrated when one of them is not at a high positive frequency. You blame it on yourself instantly. We are both very caring people, one person would disagree with that, but I will get to that later, so we take on the burden if one of us is having a challenging day. So, what do we get told time and time again from our outside help? You own your own feelings and you are not responsible for how they feel. Now, this doesn’t mean be negative and pry why they are feeling the way the are. This is all about not owning their feelings if they are having the challenging day. Guess what you do? Simple question. How can I help? It may be nothing, but sometimes it may be a waterfall of events or something gets in your head and you can’t fight it. The reason you can’t fight it is because you haven’t been taught the coping skills. I still have a hard time fighting negative feelings. We all do. THEY ARE JUST FEELINGS. This is where positive talk or reading positive affirmations is a go too. You have to do it. Empath vs Empath. They are successful couples because they are always striving to be better mentally.

We want to figure out our dark paths and why we came across the people that we did. Every person or relationship we encountered made us know what we didn’t want. Or, that person just wasn’t the right fit, and that is ok! It took heart ache, depression, anxiety, guilt, resentment, low self confidence, and anger to get to where we are at today. It made us better people. I keep sharing that we should be thanking our exes and in turn wanting our exes to succeed because they helped us get better, we hope we did the same for them.

Now, there is going to be an ex who just gets stuck because they have gone through a lot and they want to make everyone’s life miserable because they are. That is their choice. The reason I am writing this is because this specific person keeps writing negative comments on my blog. I want to write what they said. Let me just clarify something, this is person who lives on their own and has a long journey ahead of them. This is someone who I don’t deal with on a personal level. This person just likes to mix things up a bit because they know what they had, and it’s hard to move forward when you truly are not happy. Here we go:

“Both of you are frauds. Be true to your actual self. You are justifying everything you aren’t in this. This entire blog is what you think people want to hear from you. You aren’t genuine at all. At least to yourself. Wake the f up…something to what you said in your last blog post.” Now, I read this the other day and I instantly knew who it was. They are right on a few things. I was a fraud BACK in the day because I was negative and I did not like happy people. The world was against me. This is why I am sharing this blog because I want hope for people and especially this person. This ex has never sat down with me and communicated with me in the beginning. As of right now, they have showed me what hate really looks like and it makes me want better for them. I really do. I have been there at some level, not their level, but at a level. I only wish the best for them and I will keep writing and sharing your comments down in my blog because people need to know that when you try to hurt someone, it makes them so much stronger. So, thank you for making me realize how much more self confidence I have. Thank you for your honesty because that is what this blog is about. This blog is about honesty and finding the way out to your journey. After forty years, I have had the mixology of relationships which made me who I am today. I applaud the ones out there who look at the past, be grateful for it, and find the “why” behind it.