I’m Afraid

I texted the title to myself the other day and the other half of this is….to be happy. Why are we afraid to be happy? Another statement I read was, ” I wish that I had let myself be happier.” I was taking an end-of-life coaching course which was amazing because these questions and statements were thrown at me. After reading the statement, I journaled for two sentences. One, “this hits home.” Two, “I don’t know where to find this yet….still in process.” You know where you find it? In yourself. You choose to be happy. Your fakebooks posts show it. All of you out there. You post and post and post your happy lives, but let me tell you something, you are posting because you are not full of happiness. You put it out on social media. Look, I’m happy everyone., I don’t need help. Uh, you need it the most. Why don’t you find happiness in yourself? Confidence. It all comes down to confidence. We have it when we are young, we also have an abundance of love for things, but as we get older, we lose this piece by piece. We are not taught on how to get it back. We care way too damn much about what other people think. We compare. That’s another one. If you are going to compare, compare yourself to where you were last year. If you have grown more positive and stopped being critical of yourself, you are moving forward.

If I would have let myself be happier. I wouldn’t have had so many failed relationships, the biggest one would be the one with myself. If we describe ourselves as energy as I have also talked about before, the energy we put out into the universe, is the direct reflection we receive. So, Brooke, I create the bad relationships that I experience? Absolutely, one hundred percent. Bad relationships happen for an opportunity to develop your boundary skill set. Everything bad which happens to you, is for you to find what you can discover, and do it better if it happens again. The self-talk you give yourself every day is a reflection on your feelings. If a psychiatrist asked you, “Do you hear voices in your head.” Uh, yeah, my own. Now, if they are someone other than yourself, this a problem. The voices I used to hear in my head were definitely negative self-talk. “I’m not good enough.” “You could have done better today.” ” You sure you tried your best today?” “That person is more successful than me.” Well, guess what, you are good enough, you did the best you could, and no one is more successful than me because I create my own happiness, I don’t get it from social media or accolades. I get it from my own voice in my head or if I say it out loud.

Success is not about money, it’s about the steps you take to improve yourself. You learn from your mistakes, fix them, and fix that voice in your head. It takes intense coaching/ therapy, taking care of your body, and waking up wanting to take the day on because you have no idea what good could be coming your way. You might not even realize it because you are so fixated on what bad is going to happen. You create the worst-case scenario. Start creating the best-case scenario, it may need a little fixing, but only you, can make the fix. Make time for your health otherwise all you are doing is making time for your illness. Choose to be happy, you can do it. I don’t have faith; I just know it can be done. Time for you to realize that too. Stop being afraid.