Being with What Is

Now, I read this the other day from one of my positive enlightening emails I receive everyday telling me why I remain in this state of mind. When you first read the title, did you automatically think to yourself, the saying, “It is what it is.” I definitely did have a love/hate relationship with this “saying.” I reflect back on certain instances with my nursing career. If I simply thought my nursing practice was, “it is what it is,” I was in for the long negative ride. Oh wait, I have taken the long ride until last November. I will no longer finish a shift reflecting this saying. Why? Because if you keep saying it, it means you gave up. Welp, it is what it is. How about, “being with what is?” You are a part of the process, whether it may be healing or not, you own it. If you own something, don’t you want to keep making it better? It’s like remodeling yourself. Ohhh…I like where this is going.

Remodeling definitely takes time. Sometimes a long time. I moved into my house 3 yrs ago and it is an ongoing project. Now, my last house was a townhouse. I didn’t remodel anything, and guess where it got me most days? Depressed. I didn’t make it my own. All the walls were the same colors, carpet was bland, kitchen was bland, it was bland. Like my life. The last few years I was in the townhouse I was dating someone who was bland. He didn’t push me for the better. I felt I was in neutral the whole time. I pushed him to be a better person, to own his own business and guess what? He did after I broke up with him! I never understood this concept. Wouldn’t you want to better yourself when you are with a person? Be a better model. Remodel! I wasn’t the person to make him remodel. Why? I wasn’t positive, I didn’t motivate him, I simply gave him what if’s? I think your partner has to challenge you for the greater good. My current partner encouraged me to buy this new/old house. He encouraged me to try a different position at work. He continues to help me with my mental health. He has made me become independent and encourages me to live the life that I want to live. He encouraged me to rekindle lost relationships. He is definitely an encourager. You want one of those. Almost every night I ask him, “Is everything going to be okay?” I get the same answer, “yes.” Not is everything going to be okay with our relationship, but is everything going to be okay in life. “Yes.”

Be with someone who supports your dreams, your desires, your accomplishments. There is no other way. However, you become their encourager as well. It’s a two way street. Relationships always have two sides. Even relationships with yourself. You have a negative voice talking to you and you have a positive voice in your head. Which one do you listen to the most? I feel if you live in the negative mindset, you actually manifest negative outcomes that don’t even exist! You believe in them so much and it becomes your reality, becomes real. How would you alter your thinking process if you knew you manifested your current reality? How would you change your communication with your friends, family, and/or peers? Would you not want to manifest positive outcomes with every relationship which is meaningful for you? Try it. It’s called, “Being, with what is.” It’s your creation.